Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Reflections, hopes, and worries

By now you know that I traveled with my brother Coyde, Madeline, and Lillian to Chadron/Crawford for my uncles funeral. We left Saturday and returned late Monday night after the funeral. This was different than any other funeral I have attended due to long time circumstances surrounding family. For a long time my father and his brother Monty were not very close. I have never understood the grounds completely and have always been a little baffled and saddened about the wedge this drove between our families. In some strange sense this was Monty's opportunity to heal some of these gorges that had been dug. My dad had been reaching out to Monty in the recent years and it seemed like we were on our way to being able to fill in some of those gorges unfortunately while I am grateful that it seemed like dad and Monty were patching things up they were cheated out of time to say everything and do everything they wated to do together. My dad is a proud, stubborn man who in the recent years has had alot of pride to swallow. This has not always been done gracefully. It seemed without all of us knowing that he was on his way to accepting and mending bridges that were damaged by his difficulty in this area. I know he is saddened that he did not get to fulfill some of these and give complete closure before Monty passed. It tears me up inside to know that he was on his way to see his brother, offereing a piece of what they both needed to move forward in their relationship so that their families could be families again, the very morning Monty died. Although dad did not get to directly give this gift to Monty his actions and love for Aunt Gerry, and his nieces and nephew this week have more than made up for anthing in the past. Dad, I love you and hope we can have the same oppotunities to say and do the things we need to do before out time is cut too short.
To my cousins, I hope we can keep in touch and be the family we once were or the family I remember through childrens eyes.
Your loving daughter, Delanie


  1. What a beautiful post, Delanie. I hope things go well for you and your entire family.

  2. I don't know if you'll notice and read this comment because it's on a past post of yours, but I just wanted to say that your last line brought tears to my eyes, Del.

    Where did the time go? Why did we wait for something awful to happen before we came back together?? You two were my GIRLS when we were little!! (Well, you guys were little, I was bigger...) You were the only two little girls I cared about, and then, suddenly, it's been like 18 years since we've spoken?!?! Well, I promise that WON'T happen again!

    Take care, Delanie, and know that you have one more cousin out here who loves you and is definitely "in your corner"!!